Heated words flew back and forth in the air, tears welling in their eyes. Hateful comments and a lack of compassion on either end. Neither cared about each others feelings or what they were saying. Words were just daggers finding their target in the components heart. They wanted to be heard but wouldn’t hear the other. She storms out of the room. He stands there shaking.
What just happened.
Out of control. Our hearts want to leap out of our chest as we argue for what we believe in or care about. Sometimes we are right and sometimes we are not (whether we think so or not). In some situations its not about being right or wrong, but compromising. Finding middle ground together.
There are somethings that we can do to prevent conflict:
- Communicate clearly. “Communication is key in any relationship.” I pretty sure we have all heard that sentence at some point in our lives. And it couldnt be more true. My boyfriend (Jacob) and I had the hardest time communicating in the beginning and while it has gotten heaps better, it is always something we need to work on. Most of our arguments were due to simple miscommunication.
- Talk about things that bother you. Don’t be afraid to bring things to the light. You can often prevent conflict if you talk about it while it is still a minor thing. Don’t let things fester and build in you. This will only make things worse.
- Seek God together on a regular basis. This includes but is not limited to: worship, prayer, reading scripture, a devotional or book. These things will center you around Jesus and keep your focus on the right things.
There are some things to remember when in conflict:
- Don’t assume you are right. We lose so much insight in doing this. We can fail to see how God is using the other person to speak truth into your life.
- Listen thoughtfully. Take time to hear the other person out. Don’t hear one thing and get hurt, mad, scared, angry, etc. Hear it all out and take a deep breath.
- Be willing to come to a compromise and be self sacrificing. This is your opportunity to love this person more than yourself and to serve them by not having your way.
- Always consult the Bible. The Bible is your ultimate authority. It is God’s infallible voice to us. In every conversation, God’s opinion should be sought out and obeyed before and above anyone else.
- Pray together. Enough said. This is your priority. Do it.
- Don’t go to sleep while angry. Ephesians 4:26, “And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry.” Psalm 4:4,
“Be angry, yet do not sin; on your bed, search your heart and be still.” James 1:10, “for man’s anger does not bring about the righteousness that God desires.”
- Show grace. Be kind and considerate. Show the same grace that God has shown to you.
Don’t allow things to reach the point of this argument.
Be intentional to communicate well.
Have a beautiful day ❤